i was rereading my post about the camp and i realised how pissed i had felt last time maybe i'm just not cut out for that kind of stuff i cannot socialise with others i cannot do work i just cannot liek do anything so what's the use for going to camp again this year i'll just make everyone so pissed or i'll get so pissed myself so what's teh use harhh harhhh yeppps yeppps it's a whole load lame stuff i don't want to make myself fell so demoralised or feel so useless or feel so bi shi-ed that yepps i shouldn't even exist in this world yepps why would i put myself to all these kind of pissifiying stuff when i could just say at home catch up on my math catch up on cca catch up on everything totally yeppps i don;t deny i did learn something from it but yeppps the times when i got so pissed off and so offended that i just want to turn back and go home and fa pi qi or cry blah blahhh these times totally outweigh everything even all those niceness about doing behind the scenes stuff and blah i'm just escaping i know but you all just don't understand you all never see it de ohh kayyy you think it's so easy right not like i want it de ohhh kayyyy it's so pissifying i came to china to escape de ohh kayyy from all the stupid deadlines and all those cannot understand de math it's not like i don't like the camp ohh kayyy i want to go at least you will not be the ones participating in the camp but those people in charge but i don't want to put myself to that kind of lame things again people just don't understand and because of that i don't even want to go jc can i just find some all girls' jc and go study in it why must the opposite sex exist so frustrating pui

kayyy lalala back to nicer stuff in china yeppps anyway no one will care de especially about me and blahh but so anywayyy china hmmm i'm trying hard to keep awake yepps i'm trying my best then now in beijing hmmm the school totally is so strict and has so much discipline de totally cannpt stand it hmmm but this is still good larhhh maybe in some ways i don't know larhhh i'm rambling whatever no one will care de trying to do reflections which i have nothing to write about except some negative stuff blehhhs and have to do teh bsp thing tooo blahhhh what am i talking about pui i don't understand blahhhhh it's always like that de whatever no one will bother about me anywayyy so yeppps why am i stilll here in this sickening blog typing so much stuff when no one will even bother to read yeppps i know i'm being very lame blehhhhs i shall remember to delete this blog one day