haix wkends are super short i just realised it it's like i know that wkends are only like 2to3 days and yepps it's short but i've nvr really felt that it's that short haiz where are all those days when there are like a lot of public hols or sch hols which follow after the wkends haix and not too long after blks all the random tests come swarming in which is so yikes haix i want more wkends i want everyday to the wkends i want more time to finish up my unfinished stuffs i need to have more discipline i want longer wkends i want extended wkends i want sch to close down omg i'm evil i want to understand csc i want to understand physics i need to get csc into my head i want to stay at home i don't want school five days of school seem super long while 2 days of wkends seem super short yet one week passes by so quickly omg everything is so ironic and relative that it's getting disgusting everyday omg i'm addicted to the word disgusting i'm hyperventilating

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

just got back from watching half blood prince with cousins haix and it's such a pity we didn't get to take any photos or anything haix

but anywayys half blood prince yayys i just discovered that the movie didn't really mention much abt half blood prince haix i expected some form of explanation or sth but oh wells oh wells i shall go read the book or sth and yepps it's quite hard to squeeze so many stuffs into a 2 and half hr movie so hmms

but anywayys awnnns it's sadddd it feels super sadd at the end haix harry potter's first few books always end with those kind of happy happy endings and even thought there seems to be like trouble ahead we know that it's only gng to happen in the future so all in all they are happy books but from the goblet of fire onwards people are dying it feels like war and stuffs when everyone is like living in this kind of fear and apprehension and all those bad stuffs which you aren't really supposed to be feeling in these kind of books but haix still the first thing this kind of stuffs remind me is war and that's bad war is not nice haix people die and all those close ppl those ppl whom you think are infallible those powerful ppl somehow they are not as strong and undefeatable as they seem somehow they are still vulnerable which makes everything even sadder haix haix and when the burrow was burnt omg that affected me the most i think maybe more than when dumbledore died haixx

i decided watching movies in the cinemas is nice got a lot of feel even though it's not that comfortable plus you can laugh and sit or do any unglam stuffs but nobody wld do cos it's all in the dark yays

i feel like watching it a second time awns awns awns

i decided i like wearing jackets as well nice yays jackets and short skirts (:

i can't wait for the last one it's gng to be super super exciting and i don't know maybe kind of sad haix

haix and i start to miss ny again

whahhahs like what chenning said talking is therapeutic yayys yayys whahhas and i just realised shopping is very therapeutic as well yayyys whahhas window shopping helps as well and gng online and looking at all those nice stuffs feels very good lalalas (; kayys maybe not as good as buying them but still yayys oh manns shopping shopping shoppingggg whahahhas :D

somehow shopping alone or with family seems the best haix i guess shopping with ppl makes me feel super zi bei so forget it shopping is supposed to be therapeutic for me yeppos

WHAHAHS PIP DRAW IS FUNNEHH :D

i think school's really making me feel super lousy super saddening super demoralising where did all my optimism go or do i even have that before

i can't seem to find the kind of joy i get when i was in primary sch or secondary sch the kind of anticipation i get the day before school reopens i once looked forward to school that was super long ago and now i just feel like escaping clamming myself up staying at home away from school

i think e learnings were actually marking days for teachers why can't just they let us off and declare those days as marking days instead

haix i was actually quite surprised at the teachers' marking speed i didn't want to get them back so fast i just wanted to enjoy a few more days of happiness or whatever you called it not like this giving me blows and blows after blows

nothing is going well at all nothing

haix it's just going to be one rejection after another isn't it

I think I should use this blog to practise the good use of English. Complete with punctuations. Including commas. And fullstops. (OMG THAT LOOKED DISGUSTING!)

The thing about buying presents for people is that I would want those presents for myself in the end. Which gets me no where at all.

(THE FULLSTOPS LOOK SUPER DISGUSTING BLEHHS)

I think shopping trips are very fun and exciting. Especially with family. Okay, now come to think of it, maybe shopping alone is not bad after all. Yet, I think i changed for the worst after all these shopping trips which is terrible. For example, I will start to go on and on about buying a lot a lot of stuffs, and spend a lot a lot of money like nobody's business. Terrible.

I like how Sophie Kinsella writes her books. The characters, those dialogues, and how the protagonist thinks. They are all very hilarious and amusing, which make me just want to laugh and keep on reading.

There, I did it yays! The fullstops and all the punctuation still look terribly disgusting.

it feels just like before when you are supposed to feel happy and start to make plans about having so much fun going out with people doing random stuffs you realise that there's no one to do it with you i hate to admit but everytime i feel like i'm getting pushed away i feel rejected i feel like i did the wrong thing approaching ppl and then getting rejected not like they do it deliberately or directly or anything but it just hurts sometimes i feel that i'm thinking too much being oversensitive but i just can't help it i feel like clamming myself up and just stay at home everyday delete msn dao facebook disable tagboard block out the entire outside world everything's repeating itself again i realise i window shop on my own very often which is not sth i particularly like it feels embarrassing somehow esp the eating on my own part it's disgusting i wonder why i'm so concerned about all these stupid stuffs but i just am stupid disgusting person and i wandered into the library and started thinking about what is love i shall go buy can you keep a secret someday cos it's the first english book which made me laugh and i think the shopaholic series is very amusing love is a very odd thing which i can't seem to fathom i realise if i'm going to be what i said i'm going to be i have to get used to this kind of thing now in future there'll be no one alr i'll be all alone again my sister said she doesn't want to get married in future i don't know what to think she said she's going to move in with me and my family and i laugh this whole thing is filled with broken english i can't seem to speak english nowadays loser maybe we'll end up being just the two of us but i wonder if i can stand living with her who hits my head all the time and bully me instead i have to get used to all this it's getting so bad now i wonder how i would survive in future i miss you i realise if i were older then maybe i would be more mature in my thinking i would express my love more openly i can understand myself better i realise when i say i hate you it really means i hate you shouting at me but not you so from now on whenever i have this kind of hate i'd know it's only temporary and it's just cos i feel irritated and super pissed half blood's prince opening soon i still haven't read the book yet i shd seriously go read it i realise i'm a very loserish person who's nvr received those convetional gifts before conventional gifts being those stuffs you see in minitoons actioncity blah blah like soft toys or breaddough or those common stuffs which you think is too common for someone else yet it's actually sth i want to have actually i wonder if anyone really does know me at all i still think i'm the one who knows myself the best and when you say you'd rather not know the real me somehow it saddens me it's like you don't want to know me at all it's like if you'd seen the real me you would be put off that you'd shun away or sth i don't know it just feels bad my sister says i swoon over every guy i see i like the kind of nice nice easy easy feeling i feel when i'm with my family where i can just openly truthfully express my feelings without the need for any pretense or cover up or anything i want to try the milo malt macflurry someday when i was looking at my juniors' photos i really start to miss ny i decided i don't really like hc i know i'm not cut out for leadership roles cos i'm super irresponsible i want to go out but i can't find ppl to go out with i miss those times when i have fixed friends and all but i realise another thing that's wrong with me is that i have this overly possesive kind of attitude i'm super crazy i want to go usa stupid swine flu it's not fair if they're going to cancel the end of year trip i don't think i'm gng to have any future at all i don't even know what i'm gng to do and you are right i won't be even getting any scholarships cos i'm super lousy my results are lousy enough and even if my results can make it my portfolio can't so i'm gng to just stay on in spore anyway i wonder what my whole life is about i don't seem to have a goal or anything and then i start to think about death sometimes it feels super close or sth somehow and i would start to think why bother working so hard for since we are all gng to die in the end and that's the end of it i don't know choy i like disneyland a lot even though you said it's super childish i like those kind of warm and fuzzy kind of feeling yays i like i want to spend the entire week in disneyland so i can play on all the games including those exciting ones and take photos with so many diff characters i want to spend two weeks in disneyworld cos i think it's bigger and i'd probably need more time i want to tour the airport one day i think i like to start imagining and fantasizing a lot of things which aren't going to come true at all and so i'd try to drive all these thoughts away but i can't so in the end i'd just tell myself it's ohkay cos it's only just some fantasy and it won't true so just enjoy the fantasy and all i can be happy in my own imagined world instead i think i feel jealous all the time jealous about a lot of things and envy i hate myself i'm a horrible person i wouldn't want to make friends with myself that's super disgusting i feel like crying now but crying's super tiring i'm a super lousy person cos i cry super easily which is disgusting i don't rlly like it when ppl try to point out my sort of good points cos evidently they are not good points either they are not good qualities or they are just not good enough it's super disgusting i'm super disgusting one day i should really just disappear and go lead my loner life and cut off all contact with everyone yes one day i should really do that nobody would care anywhere as i type this i find myself becoming even more disgusted with myself disgusting lousy person who shouldn't even exist in the first place i'm sorry

YAYYYS I SURVIVED BLOCKS ;D

BLOCKS END TODAY FOR US YAYYS :D WHAHHAS I'M GLOATING COS THERE'S NO TESTS FOR ME TMR YAYYS NICE FEELING HOHOS ;D

ehh i realise a lot of people's birthdays are coming up in jul very interesting hohos ehh and i feel like going out now yayyys i feel like doing random stuffs lalalas :D whahahs and zhangdongliang's new songs are hehhs :D

haix i forgot what i wanted to blog le hohos yayys feel quite happy now and feel like doing a lot of things whahhhas even though math and phy were quite screwed blahhs i'm incoherent again hmms

LALALAS :D

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